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Watch Tina Fey Crash Weekend Update to Eat Her Feelings and Trash Trump

No one can angrily wolf down a sheet cake quite like Tina Fey.

Few people can deliver scathing critiques while also housing a sheet cake. But if 30 Rock taught us anything, it’s that Tina Fey is just the woman for that job—and she proved it Thursday night, when she stopped by Weekend Update to pal around with Michael Che and Colin Jost and offer some thoughts, as a U.Va. grad, on what happened in Charlottesville, Virginia.

“It broke my heart to see these evil forces descend upon Charlottesville,” Fey said. “And then our president, Donald John Trump—which, I don’t think people talk enough about what a stupid, jackass name that is; it does not flow, Donald John; whatever, he gets away with it because he’s gorgeous—anyway, Donny John comes out, and he says that he condemns violence ‘on many sides, on many sides,’ Colin. And I’m feeling sick because, you know, I’ve seen Raiders of the Lost Ark, and I wasn’t confused by it.”

With more rallies planned for Saturday, Fey noted many Americans are likely feeling a little helpless. Her solution? It’s a pretty Liz Lemon-like response: “I would urge people this Saturday instead of participating in the screaming matches and the local violence, find a local business you support. Maybe a Jewish-run bakery or an African-American-run bakery. Order a cake with the American flag on it like this one, and just eat it, Colin.” Naturally, Fey brought her own cake for a demonstration.

This do-nothing solution is not likely going to be popular with everyone; even Jost wondered on air how that’s supposed to help. Still, Fey continued to wolf down cake as she launched into a rant.

“Next time when you see a bunch of white boys in polo shirts screaming about taking our country back, and you want to scream, ‘It’s not our country; we stole it from the Native Americans, and when they have a peaceful protest at Standing Rock, we shoot at them with rubber bullets, but we let you chinless turds march through the streets with semi-automatic weapons!’ When you want to yell that, don’t yell it at the Klan, Colin—yell it into the cake. Then when Ann Coulter crawls out of her roach motel and says, ‘Antifa attacked Republicans in Berkeley,’ and you’re like ‘O.K., yard-sale Barbie, but the other side is Nazis and Klansmen. And also, who drove the car into the crowd, Hillary’s e-mails?’ “ Basically, the solution seems to be: yell it into the cake.

And where, Fey wondered, “is Paul Ryan in all of this? Right? You’re supposed to be the cool, young congressman, but you don’t know how to @ somebody on Twitter? ‘Racism is bad, @realDonaldTrump,’ you pussy!”

“And then Donny Johnny says we need to defend our country’s beautiful Confederate monuments when you know he would take them down in a second if he thought he could build a bunch of poorly constructed condos on the spot,” Fey added.

By the time she was finished ranting, Fey had Che eating cake as well. She also went ahead and dipped a grilled-cheese sandwich in the confection at one point, because why not? Her conclusion? “I really want to encourage all good, sane Americans to treat these rallies this weekend like the opening of a thoughtful movie with two female leads: don’t show up. Let these morons scream into the empty air. I love you, Charlottesville—and as Thomas Jefferson once said, ‘Who’s that hot, light-skinned girl over by the butter churn?’”