sex and the city

Forget Oprah 2020—Kim Cattrall Wants Winfrey on Sex and the City 3

Or Ellen DeGeneres. Or Tiffany Haddish. Or. . .
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Left, by Getty Images; right, by Michael Kovac/Getty Images.

“I know your friends just fine,” Mr. Big once told Sex and the City’s Carrie Bradshaw. “Charlotte is the brunette, Miranda is the redhead, and Samantha is trouble.” It was a reductive description and a catchy quote—but it might also be instructive if and when Sex and the City 3 ever gets made. As fans are well aware, Kim Cattrall, who played Samantha Jones in the original series and films, has repeatedly said that she will never return to the franchise—leaving one-fourth of the central troupe unaccounted for. Cattrall has already suggested that her role be re-cast with a black or Hispanic actress; indeed the main ingredient to a successful Samantha will likely not be found in her appearance, but in her impish personality. As for who might capture that spirit? Cattrall’s got a few interesting suggestions.

How about, for instance, Ellen DeGeneres? During a sit-down with the talk-show host this week, Cattrall’s erstwhile co-star Sarah Jessica Parker said she thought DeGeneres would be perfect for the role—and, true to Samantha form, Cattrall endorsed the idea by saying, “She’d be fabulous!” But does DeGeneres really have the saucy quality it takes to play Samantha? Hey, if she can bring to life a forgetful fish, she can probably play anything—but just in case, Cattrall then threw out a few other suggestions of her own.

What about Oprah Winfrey? Cattrall tweeted that although she’s partial to Ellen, “Oprah was always be my 1st.” The idea might not jibe for everyone at first blush—and Winfrey might have to cancel her hypothetical 2020 presidential campaign to make it happen—but you know what? I can see it, sort of. Switch handing out cars to handing out vibrators and butt plugs, and we might be in business! But just in case that doesn’t work, Cattrall saw fit to leave us with a few more backup options—specifically, Girls Trip breakout Tiffany Haddish and Modern Family’s Sofía Vergara.

For those who can’t quite talk themselves onto the Ellen or Oprah train, either of those two might be a little easier to envision in the role. After all, both have some very Samantha-like credentials: Vergara has made a career out of playing characters who smolder, while Haddish brings a delightful candor to every event she graces with her presence, from S.N.L.’s Studio 8H to awards ceremonies. For example, during her showstopping New York Film Critics Circle acceptance speech, Haddish said, “I’m wearing a pretty dress. I don’t know if my coochie is showing right now or not. If it is, it’s cool, because I’m wearing God’s panties and my panties on top of them.” (Hey, remember that time Smith Jerrod told Samantha that “bush is back”?) The only problem with Haddish is that she might be a bit young to be palling around with Carrie, Charlotte, and Miranda—but if she’s cool with it, we’re cool with it.

Is there any apparent pattern to Cattrall’s suggestions? Not really. But if replacing Samantha gets us another Sex and the City, honestly, why not? (Psst, Kim, a free suggestion for the next time you’re pitching replacements—how about Christina Aguilera?) After all, as Carrie herself once said, “Maybe you have to let go of who you were to become who you will be.” If the person Samantha will be is any one of these women, the other three should consider themselves lucky.